How Your Mind Sabotages the Future

Mind Sabotage. Photo by Miryam Zarzar

In all likelihood, your mind is quietly ruining your life and sabotaging your future.

This is not hyperbole. I strongly suggest you read the following post and put what I suggest into practice right away. If it works for you, tell someone else about it.

Your mind is constantly telling stories and creating mental associations. A mental association could be a song on the radio that reminds you of summer vacation. Or maybe your mind associates the texture of dried figs and dates with hairy tarantula legs. Oh wait, that’s me.

A few of your own peculiar mental associations probably come to mind.

Many of these mental pairings (commonly referred to as neuro associations) don’t make a lick of sense, but it doesn’t matter. Once a neuro association ‘clicks’, it sticks. They are reinforced everytime you recall them.

Some neuro associations are relatively harmless (like the figs example) while others are beneficial and empowering.

An example of a good neuro association is how Rejection Therapy makes being rejected an exciting and positive experience.

Rejection Therapy accomplishes this in three ways:

1)  Making rejection into an exciting game where rejection equals success
2)  Because rejection is success in Rejection Therapy, being rejected by someone is considered a favour. Players are also encouraged to think kind thoughts of those who have recently rejected them
3)  Rejection builds confidence because over the 30 Day Challenge, players physically and psychologically adapt to the stresses of rejection

Neuro associations can also alter your life projectory in negative ways and cut off future outcomes.

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For instance, those who have ever been in a long term toxic relationship won’t soon forget what an emotional sucking chest wound it can be.  The ordeal can make the mere thought of being in another relationship foreboding.

Worse yet, this negative neuro association that links being in a relationship to emotional hell is reinforced again and again by negative self talk.

My advice to you, and this is coming from personal experience: watch the self-talk. Listen to the stories you tell yourself. If you identify yourself as being a victim in these stories, or feel pangs of sorrow or regret from past experiences, you need to stop the negative thinking and analyse what you’re telling yourself. You are likely reinforcing negative neuro associations and sabotaging future decisions.

Instead, retell your stories from a more empowering perspective. Interrupt your bad thinking and create a positive new neuro association.

So lets go back to the long term toxic relationship example and retell the story from an empowering perspective.

Anytime the neuro association “emotional sucking chest wound” arises in the mind, consciously replace it with positive thoughts and feelings that give yourself some options for the future.

Tell yourself something like “I’m stronger and wiser because of that time in my life and eager to be a more empathetic and patient in my next relationship“. Lay it on thick.

Try it. Pay attention to what your mind is saying. Discover how your mind sabotages the future and stop it before it’s too late.

I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A small bird will drop frozen from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself. –Lawrence


Confidence gives a fool the advantage over a wise man.

William Hazlitt

How to Avoid Personal Disasters of Your Own Making

Avoid Personal Disaster

On a typical transcontinental flight, a commercial airplane will be off course 95% of the time.

Despite being off course so much, flights consistently arrive on time at the correct destination because of continuous course correction. Pilots rely on the aircraft’s constantly recalibrating navigational systems and a pilot simply needs to follow procedures and the plane will do the rest.

In fact, commercial aircraft of the past several decades are equipped with primary, auxiliary, back-up, and emergency systems and can fly to their destination safely even when an engine conks out mid-flight.

So how is it that with so many fail-safe features in place, month after month, year after year, tragic aviation accidents are reported?

Data compiled of 1,300 fatal accidents of commercial aircraft across the world revealed pilot error as the main cause of these crashes. It’s faulty thinking, not faulty systems that plunged a plane full of passengers into the depths of the Atlantic ocean, as was the case of Air France Flight 447.

The three pilots involved in the AF447 were all experienced and were flying the state-of-the-art Airbus 330, but when caught in a storm they failed to rely on the aircraft’s proven navigational system.

In life, we all experience storms, even the most experienced and successful people. It’s how we ride out these personal storms and knowing when to get help that matters.

As mentioned in previous articles and interviews, my depression ramps up at certain times of the year. Winter in particular is psychologically oppressive for me.

During the bitterly cold winter months of ice, snow and endless grey skies that seem straight out of a Tim Burton movie, I worry for the population of homeless cats in my city. Many stray cats will starve and freeze to death before the spring thaw.* These thoughts haunt me when the temperatures drop, and I feel powerless to stop it.

I’m not sure why I have such an affiliation with cats. I sometimes joke that I must be manifesting the Catman, a comic book character my father and artist George Freeman created in 1975.** Catman was named after me and has the last name Corey (Corey is my brother).

Rejection Therapy helps combat these gloomy thoughts because it forces me to reach out and interact with people instead of succumbing to the quicksand of negative thinking.

I also step up my meditation and will take anti-depressants for a short time.

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However, despite these fail-safe systems, I need all the positivity I can get. So this year, for the first time ever, I started listening to Personal Power II by Tony Robbins.***

Now, I recognise that other than a small goat-herding tribe in the Himalayas, I’m probably the only person on Earth who hasn’t listened to Tony Robbins. I ignored his stuff  because the cheesy intro music and fist pumping rah-rahs were a little too over the top for my liking – but there is no denying his system works for many people, so I decided to give it a try.

After listening to the introduction and two days of the course, I think my initial impressions were  (gasp, shock) wrong. It’s actually pretty good stuff.

What amazes me the most about the program is its similarities to Rejection Therapy.

Tony mentions how Personal Power II is based on the science of neurology, something I’m keenly interested in and has bled into the design of Rejection Therapy.

Tony encourages his listeners face their fears head on – the very essence of what Rejection Therapy is about.

He mentions how successful people fail more often and that failure can be a great motivator for lasting change. I’ve written about similar realizations.

More importantly, Personal Power II teaches how to create positive neuro associations, just as Rejection Therapy reframes rejection as fun and empowering.

At the end of each day, Personal Power II even has an assignment to do before going on to the next day. The Rejection Therapy suggestion cards work the same way.

These similarities, along with the many testimonials I’ve received telling me how Rejection Therapy has helped them overcome fear, is further confirmation Rejection Therapy works. I know it works because it’s changed my own life.

My point is this: if  life is getting you down, you can turn it around.  It may be as easy as  trying a  personal success system like the Rejection Therapy 30 Day Challenge.

Don’t wait until it’s too late. Make the necessary course corrections today.


* I know this isn’t entirely rational, but neither is not caring about it at all.

** My Dad’s comic book, where you’ll find the Catman, is at

*** Affiliate link




Live to the point of tears.


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